a realization was made that what was happening was really happening. i immediately felt like i was slipped some kind of drug. my insides felt as if i had swallowed a tube of fluorescent blue toothpaste. i wanted to vomit everywhere. suddenly i was left to be alone. i could feel myself actually become weightless and this made me pay attention to my sense of physical touch. there was nothing there and nothing was solid, like i was expelled from my body and into a dreamland in the same effect that psychedelic mushrooms give me. i didn’t cry at first as i thought i might have, but instead silently panicked at the awful confused sensation i was currently undergoing. this was enough pain. finally, a rupture of tears came. i stood myself up and hovered slowly to the bathroom and back. i could have been a goddamn ghost. i couldn’t feel anything.
